Moving in with your boyfriend is a colossal step in any relationship.
It’s the first time you’re truly morphing both your lives under one
roof, with no escape. I’ve been living with my boyfriend for three years
now, and I thought I’d share some insight on the reality of what it’s
like to live with the man you love.
Ladies, if you’re about to move in with your man, let me begin by
saying it entails more than just picking decorative bathroom towels and
finding block letters of your initials.
Sure, both of those things are imperative, but you also have to learn
to how hold in your farts for an extended period of time. (Don’t worry,
it’s just a temporary requirement until he realizes breaking the lease
will cost much more than breaking up with you.)
What I’m trying to say is, worry less about which floor lamp you’re
going to buy and more about the fact you’re about to share a home with
someone who has testicles.
Just like anything else, living with your boyfriend has its pros and cons.
I’ve listed them below so you know what you’re getting yourself into.
Pro: He’ll be your live-in handyman
Assuming your boyfriend has two hands and isn’t a complete moron, you’ll
never have to worry about calling someone to hang a picture or repair
the toilet. The best part is, fixing things makes men feel worthy and
heroic, so really you’re just being a caring girlfriend.
Con: It’s gonna get hairy
I’m not going to feed you bullsh*t and pretend I don’t shed — I’ve been
known to clog some drains in my day (from the hair on my HEAD) — but
nothing compares to male hair grooming. At least once a week, my poor
sink looks like a porcupine. The question always remains: Is it from his
face or his balls? I guess some things are best left undiscovered.
Pro: He’ll be your bedtime bodyguard
My boyfriend sleeps closest to the door; this way, if we have an
intruder, he can fight the person off while I escape through the window.
Con: He’ll be a “Real Housewives” heckler
I’m obsessed with Bravo. I enjoy watching thoughtless, mind-numbing
reality television after a long day at work — that’s how I unwind. When
my boyfriend comes home and sees I’m on the couch watching “Real
Housewives,” he acts as if I’m an unemployed crackhead. He’ll be like,
“Your girl Teresa is trash.” I’m like, first of all, this is “Real
Housewives of Beverly Hills” and second of all, Teresa has been
incarcerated for six months — have some respect! Also, Andy Cohen owns
my soul, so I couldn’t stop watching even if I wanted to.
Pro: He’ll be the Chairman of Chores
When living with a friend, you can’t be like, “Yo, do the dishes”
because she’d be like, “Um, no, go f*ck yourself.” But when your
roommate is your boyfriend, you can (graciously) ask him to put the
dishes away, take out the trash and even air dry your thongs!
Con: His fingerprints will be all over your top-shelf toiletries
Men are lazy. Let me elaborate: When your boyfriend runs out of his body
wash, he is going to use your $28 Bliss Body Butter Scrub. Oh, and it
doesn’t end there. Girls, if you buy fancy, expensive shampoo, tell him
it will turn his hair blonde if he keeps using it. Works like a charm.
I apologize in advance if this article has made you reconsider moving in with your man.
Living with anyone is difficult because we’re all undeniably strange creatures with even stranger habits.
The key to successfully living with your other half is being able to
accept all the weird sh*t he or she does behind closed doors and still
love that person unconditionally.
If you can do that, chances are, you could probably spend the rest of your lives together.
-Ariel Klein|Elite Daily